It IS about the gifts
by Randy Kiel | January 14, 2025
There are just some things that only family members can say to one another and experiences that only happen within family walls such as grief, humor, conflict, hard discussions, savory foods, silly games, and personal gifts. What we do and say with our families often is not what we do and say in public. We have a public self and a private self. One way to think of family, is that it is a group of genetically and ancestrally related “selves” who continually reflect one another in all kinds of light. Aw, the gift of family.
My family has a running joke that they use to get me. When we gather, there will be “hair jokes.” For example, “Dad, I knew you were home because I saw your hair come in.” Thank goodness we have been given humor to help with being a family. Aw, the gift of humor.
We need humor. The funny comments and stories that don’t hurt anyone. We also need the supportive comments of empathy. “Dad, it’s Christmas Eve,” my son said, “how is your sadness tonight?” Only those closest to me would know of the personal history of Christmas Eve and its sad events. Aw, the gift of empathy.
Yet, we continue on in the holiday season. We sing Christmas carols that recall Christ’s birth. Many of our favorite songs and carols speak to the longing for family at times of holiday, i.e. “I’ll be home for Christmas.” How nice it is when we get to be in our special places and celebrate with our families.
The word “family” is powerful. It evokes hopeful imagination, future longings and joyous desire, especially for the young. And yet reflectively, we may hear this word and recall not only joyous times but also memories of tumult or loneliness. Not all family holidays are “holly and jolly.” Throughout life we will have a mixture of all sorts of experiences with holidays.
A holiday is not just any other day on the calendar. It is a day set aside for specific historical or joyous reasons, commonly the commemoration of a momentous event in life. Within our Church, we have Holy Days and Feast Days, days identified and marked by God’s intervention into our human lives for specific reasons. Yet, every “today,” regardless of what comes our way, is like a holy day, being that it is a day that marks the miracle of life that is to be lived unto the purpose it asks of you.
In special celebrations we think of gifts. Gifts to be given and gifts to be received. Often, we may hear someone say, “It’s not about the gifts!” Internally I wonder, “How would we have the Mass if it were not for the gifts?” Aw, the gift of Eucharist.
With every day comes the gift of free will from God. It was His intent to grant us this free will; it is up to our intent how to respond to it. Our attitude about life is the reflection and response to this free will. How do we see life? The answer to this is personal perspective. Perhaps, in the morning when we rise, we can see God’s daily miracle - life. And perhaps, every night as we sleep, we see God’s evening miracle - rest. And it will be that in our eventual death, that we will receive God’s eternal miracle, Heaven. Aw the gift of life.
Just as it is that during the nighttime that our brain does not fully sleep, so too our soul never sleeps. I think of the hymn from long ago, “He never sleeps. He never slumbers. He watches me, night and day. He keeps me safe along the way.” He protects the soul living inside of each of us.
A beloved carol that is sung in many Churches on Christmas Eve is O Holy Night. This song seems to choke up the heart of all who hear it. Not only is it a beautiful tune, but the words of the song itself contain a beautiful message.
“Long lay the world in sin and error pining, till he appeared, and the soul felt its worth.”
Our soul finds its worth in Christ, who IS family. He is Trinity - Father, Son, Holy Spirit. May we never be lost in the sense of not belonging. That would be darkness. He is Light. Aw, the gift of belonging. Aw, the gift of light.
You see, it IS about the gifts!